I cried the other day for the first time in a very long time... why? .... by watching City of Angels! Honestly, didn't like the movie at first because of its sad ending but it made me realize that she was lucky to love and be very loved in return.
At first, watery eyes lang then the scene with Nicholas Cage came "I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss of her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One. ". The tears just wont stop after!

I think what I felt that day was mixed emotions.. from the film and from what Im experiencing. I'm starting to fall for someone who doesn't even know what love means... tough? You could say I'm a masochist! Should I wait for him to love me back or is it really impossible for him and maybe I should just walk away and move on? I want to be right this time... someone told me I'm the director of my life... True! But it's just hard to walk away...
It feels really bad when you fall in love with someone you can’t have or doesn't love you back. It feels even worse when you are sure that this relationship can never work out. I think that this is the worst thing that could ever happen to someone. I believe that to forget someone is one of the hardest “assignments” given in life. Therefore all of these thoughts crossing my mind drove me deeply into the psychology of what is called falling wrongly into love.

Just learned from a friend that it helps to write all the good things that happened and read them over and over again, then you'll realize that you have alot of things to appreciate...

* thankful that i had a good sleep... it wasn't the best dream but at least i was able to dream.
* for a loving sister that guides me and still gives me advice even if she's busy working
* a friend that cheers you up everytime you're down
* pasta for lunch
* my gummy bears
* my job
* people were not mean to me today

* realize your mistakes and learn from it....

"Ohh im yours can wait to you come home cause its the way that you love, that makes me wanna surrender to you.Im yours im giving you my all and every piece of my heart, you can never refer no question i'm yours. "

If this is what I get from falling..getting hurt.. having both my legs bruised... well, i guess it should be okay! :p

After swimming, I accidentally stepped on the gutter of the pool and fell! Got both my legs wounded and bruised!... Good thing nobody saw me fall, i think that would be soooo embarassing!

Thanks to my sister, she took care of me.. placed ice on both legs and cleaned my wounds. The next day, I told about the incident to my friend.... and I got this!!! hmm... should be worth falling into the gutters again! :p

To that person, thanks.. for making me smile. :)

What a crappy, lame movie... waste of money! the humour's okay, funny at times....but please, don't watch this in a movie house. Whatta waste! In my opinion, i can only remember one part... Will Ferrell singing Cher's Believe! Well, i was laughing my ass off but that's it... heheh. :p
Rating: 1 popcorn!

Ooppss.. na late ung post ng pictures.. :p

I went home to Manila last May 15.. this is actually what i wished for, bday gift ba.. hehe. :p
I wanted to spend my birthday at home and with my friends.. Post birthday celebration na sha actually. Cali and Marv was there as well, mga balikbayans! :D

Sayang wasn't able to see my good friend din from Australia, another balikbayan..sosyal, puro balikbayan... well, i think the right word is OFW's! hahaha;p I was only in Manila for 3 days, didn't do much but at least got to spend it with my family.. well next time, maybe i can stay longer! :p

1. Enjoy being alive. There's plenty of time to be dead.

2. Sometimes, nobody really cares if you are miserable so you might as well be happy.

3. If you can't solve it, it's not a problem - it's reality!

4. Happiness is like perfume; you can't pour on others w/o getting few drops on yourself.

5. If all good things must come to an end, then don't worry. All bad things eventually would end too.


I wish these positive thoughts can make other people realize that life is beautiful.. Things may go wrong but we have to stay positive and believe that God will always be there for us. When in doubt, just take the next small step...
Hope everyone have a pleasant day like I do!~~~. :D

"Time heals what reason cannot"

But what's important is how you celebrate it... I celebrated mine with people close to me, my family! I got to blow 2 cakes and made 2 wishes.. hehe..

I wouldn't say this was the best birthday but this wasn't so bad at all.. Everyone important, friends, family, even enemies remembered my birthday and that made it special.:D


"Lord, Thank you for giving me another year to celebrate... "

It was Aay's Hen Night!


went to Howl at the Moon in Somerset and got home around 2AM.. the music was okay, some songs were not familiar (at all!) but all in all it was fun.. i think aay enjoyed it too. :-) there was a dare that aay had to do on stage and we also played 'truth or dare' for her but it turned out to be an easy one, coz she knew EVERY detail of her and Gie!:D

My first muay thai experience was very tiring...

Yesterday, i went to try muay thai at fight g and i swear...different ito! i had fun and at the same time i felt a little stupid, like i'm a 'bobo' for doing it... others seem to be super pro na to MT that i got embarassed for being a newbie.. hehe.. i wasn't sure if i'm doing it right and its quite hard to do some of their routine.. but, after a few tries i got the hang of it.:D (i think)luckily, today my body's not aching.. i actually feel fine and surprisingly, i wanted to do more... your whole body's working out, you can burn alot of fats and you'll sweat like a pig.. panalo! You get to release stress pa and if you want to include it, then sige pati anger..:D There are other benefits pa.. cutiepie on the side.. (but of course, i have to focus, asus! ndi naman nagpunta don to make pa-cute!) :p

I'll definitely try it again or perhaps enroll!

"When you're tired of the world, when times feel like a living hell, when it feelis like you have failed and fallen short of your expectations.. it doesn't hurt to believe in a better day... Coz even wounds, no matter how deep, will fight to heal.. and they eventually will.."

I need a hobby... a diversion...

the rain makes me feel sleepy and sometimes gloomy... don't know why...but it does...

It's funny how it makes me want to crawl into bed and watch a movie, listen to my Twilight Saga, take a nap, or read a book...
I don't know, maybe this triggered because I've heard some bad news this past weekend, it makes me want to stay in bed.. wish i can forget everything! I wanna wake up one day and not feel the hate in my heart...
Although I've realized one thing about all this... i can never escape the pain but atleast i can choose between doing what is right or go with the flow-believing it will be alright. I need time to perfectly heal so i chose to believe. I'm taking one step at a time now, on things actually, either that will be a good thing or a bad thing, i honestly don't know and maybe don't care... Everyday i read passages from 'God calling', it keeps reminding me to 'believe & obey'... I have to go back again in that direction, stop worrying and forcing myself to be okay. Enjoy each day, be thankful for simple things.. Everything will fall into its right place... i know.. :)


"Be patient towards all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not seek the answers, which cannot be given now; rather live the questions. All good things come to those who wait. Patience is the companion of wisdom. It is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.."

this morning, as usual i had a lot of work then after lunch, ayan na.. petiks nanaman. SO, i searched the net and thought of watching a movie na lang. Of course, it was a sneaky move.. i had to use my earphones and minimize ung window na may movie(para hindi halatang petiks sa work). :p Thanks to watch-movies.net, i was able to watch 'The Women'. It evolves around Mary (Meg Ryan), she's the perfect example of 'women' who tends to fix everything around her that she forgets about herself. (ahem, sounds familiar!) Story: her husband cheated on her, she was fired from her job by her father, her daughter hates her and had a fight with her bestfriend.. it was a simple movie and i knew what the ending would be.. but what caught my attention was the line "what do you want, mary?" This made me think as well, WHAT DO I WANT? What does Min want?!? So after my 6PM mass, i ate in Long John Silver's alone! (hahah!) but surprisingly, it was okay.. time for myself, to think and ponder the events of the movie.. so what do i really want? :D I actually made a collage (just now..at 1AM) in microsoft word (laftrip!) coz i still can't sleep... another sleepless night... so instead of attaching 'my masterpiece', i'll just enumerate the things i want to do.. :D

I wanna go to a cooking class, I always wanted to cook but i just don't know how..
all i know is cook pasta and to fry!:p i want to learn simple stuff like chicken curry
but NOT SPICY, pork steak, morcon, beef kaldereta and of course my favorite kare-kare.
(ahahah, simpleng-simple noh! :p) mmm... kakagutom!

I also want to continue rowing, i know i'll get big.. or my upper body will get bigger but at least i'll do something, i have a sport that i can release all my 'energy'... hahah! meet new people at the same time. :D


i also would like to try wakeboarding! just try and see if i can do it! it is something i've been wanting to do but so scared that i might stumble, get hurt and look stupid.. :s
Finally, i want to run/jog every weekend on the beach. Around 5 or 6am, just jog and relax... (in my bikini plus shirt shempre.. hahaha!, pwede rin!:p) Just imagine, cool air, peaceful, no one bothering you.. you can just be yourself! Then have breakfast sa shore, i mean beside the beach.. Mcdonalds... sausage mcmuffin with egg... there goes my exercise! :D

These are the things i want to do..soon! now that i have plenty of time, and now that there's nothing to lose..dba? why not try everything... you never know, i might actually enjoy it and this might be 'the pleasant change' i've been waiting for...

I've decided to set achievable goals this year that will help me lead a more comfortable life.. here's some.. :p

2. Learn something new each month
It is too easy to fall into the same old boring routine and this will not make you feel better. Instead, learn something new each month. Think of something that will interest you, maybe learning a new instrument or joining a sport. Learning something different doesn't require you to have money, search in the inet and learn a new recipe or a new 'programming language' (nerd!:p), which is totally free!

3. Count your blessings
Don't you notice that, the bad things are easier to believe? Stop that theory and start counting on your blessings. Be thankful everyday that you are still alive and whatever problem you may have, face it with a smile! God loves us so much, we just have to open our eyes and see the thousand good things we have in life.

This day would be my day... the day i was set free from all things that hunted me for the last 2 months... now im sure it wasn't my fault... that all my accusations were true...i was branded as the 'absurd' girlfriend... with a vehement denial and made me feel that the relationship fell apart because of the fights we had which made me the cynical one...
it all happened so fast.. first he was asking for space (when we are already miles apart).. then the hurtful words came out on christmas day.. (imagine, christmas! how can anyone do that to someone who you say you 'love')..days passed and was trying to calm myself down. On new year's day, i received an unexpected call.. he blamed me for things i said that was not even my fault and which i didn't really say.. 2 supposedly 'happy days' of the year, and he didn't care if he'll break my heart..again! didn't even think of how i would feel.. Dang! how selfish can you get.
i heard a million lies.. kept waiting for several nights for things to change.. made excuses for him.. cried for nights.. accepted his hurtful words..sacrificed alot...but i can't be that person anymore....
Today, seeing and tracing all the evidences of betrayal...i can be free and stop blaming myself.. i know im not a perfect girlfriend, but i sure gave him my best! if that wasn't enough, then you're not for me to begin with... i will not settle for less.. and yes, i do agree with your 'parting words'... i DO deserve someone better....
Moving on is never easy but with this situation, i know that is the best thing.. letting you go with a smile, and now, my heart can be whole again. i will never give up and never stop believing that life will be better for me... I WILL BE BETTER!

I'm soo happy for you staki..i know you'll be a great mom to Ryla! :D
Am i ready to be a mom too?? We were talking about it, I might be next.. Nah... hehe... But I would like to get married..soon.. :p

my valentine's day was the best ever.. :p i got to see all my cousins, had the best date and got to shop! san ka pa?!? :p with my cousins and my mom. :-)

kuya neil gave all the girls flowers... my gosh kuya, at talaga naman sumakay ka pa jan! :p only in d pilipins...